i fear nothing... rite!

I was going to take my bath just now when i got waylaid by a cockroach! Yeah, u heard me rite. A disgusting, horrible, repulsive cockroach. The only thing on earth i fear more than fear itself... roaches... I think they are really dumb. They are the only creatures that run TOWARDS u when u are busy running away from them to avoid them. Idiotic, rite?

So anyway, i was in the living room and from the corner of my eye, i saw something zip past under the coffee table in the hall. I took a closer look and just as i suspected, EEEEEEEKS, a cockroach! I panicked. There was no one else in the house. Who can i ask to terminate the nasty thing?? So i ran off to the kitchen to grab the bottle of insecticide. Came back armed with fire power. Took an aim and sprayed as much as i could. Okie, for ur information, i was like 3 metres away. That's as close as i possibly dared to go. Bad idea! She (how did i know it was a she? I found out later. No, not by disecting it, u silly thing!) went nuts. Run around like a fanatical thing with pants on fire, then she FLEW (that's how i knew it was a female, only females fly)!!! AAAAAAAAAAARGH!!! The only thing i fear more than roaches, flying roaches! I hopped back as far as i could, still spraying insecticide like mad. Then, it crawled under the shoe cabinet and i couldn't see where it went. So i proceeded to empty half the bottle of insecticide at the cabinet. To cut a long story short. It die-ed, after much chasing and spraying. Else, i wouldn't be able to sleep in peace tonight. It's lying on the floor at the corner somewhere, i wouldn't pick it up, thank you. Someone else has to do that dirty job! Haha!

This incident reminded me of another roach misadventure. I was in secondary school then, wat was i? 14 or 15? All my frens knew i feared roaches. No big secret there. Well, the day went on as usual, after classes, we went to the hawker centre to have our lunch. Hey, we were all poor students then, some poorer than others. Haha.. So we ordered our food and were happily chomping it down when, no.. dun worry, we did not discover a roach in our food. That's gross but this was worse. A stupid cockroach ran under our feet! Immediately, i jumped up and screamed (very loudly, mind u). Okie, the hawker centre was full of people and they (mostly old uncles) turned to stare at me (who by that particular moment has already hopped more than 5 metres away). So, imagine this, i was seated on those stuck-to-the-ground kind of stools. I screamed, grabbed my school bag (it was on my lap wat), jumped backwards and over the silly stool, away from the cockroach, with amazing dexterity and speed, while managing not to trip myself. It was like doing the Olympics. The stunned uncles then gave me weird, grinning looks when they realised i was frightened of a tiny cockroach. All this time, my frens were looking at me with mouths opened. Then, they proceeded to laugh their heads off. See, wat good frens i had even then. My frens always said i am a roach magnet, they are naturally attached to me. I only have one thing to say, duhz!

Wat purpose do roaches serve on earth anyway? I can think of NONE! Irritating, spasticated things... DIE! DIE!