Not amused.

This afternoon as i was happily sitting at home, minding my own biz, guess what happened? I got stalked by a stupid, idiotic, spasticated BIRD! To be specific, it was a mynah. Silly, dumb, i-have-to-kill-it (not that i really would) bird! What takes the cake was that it (said mynah) wasn't just contented with harassing me once.... it had to do it twice! Aaaaaaaargh!

So, the day was really hot and i opened all the windows in the house and even left the main door opened. I was in the bedroom for a while doing something and then i went into the kitchen to get a drink. When i wanted to turn and go out, i realised it (THE mynah) had been hopping behind me! I attempted to shoo it away, thinking that birds usually would fly out the nearest window (don't they normally do that??!). So i stomped my feet and made some loud noises BUT it just looked at me with the most incredulous look, as if to say 'hey, don't be silly, i am not frighten by you!'. Then it hopped even closer to me! Okie, i know i said i am not scared of anything but roaches.... but, but, but... have you ever met a bird who was not to be frighten off?? I have never. :P

Anyways, i realised that i had no where to go but into the toilet which i did and promptly closed the door. i thought it would have flown off by now cos beside the toilet was wide, opened windows. No such luck! I pushed the toilet door slightly ajar to peep outside and guess what i saw? There at the crack was that silly mynah peeping right back at me! I swear! It's true... it was doing this slightly cocked head thing and face to one side with one eyeball staring straight back at me. If that is not called peeping, i don't know what else it's called. I tried to spray some water through the crack and banged loudly on the door, hoping it would be frighten off. Well, that's the best i could come up with given the fact that i was kept captive in my own toilet by a silly bird! Again, no such luck, it wasn't even the least bit impressed with what i could come up with, and even tried to push its way in through the crack! In the end, i stayed in the toilet for at least a good 10 minutes. Of cos, i got out in the end, how else would i be sitting here blogging about this then?

I got (read: ran) out when i saw that it was no longer guarding at the door (thinking with glee that it finally flew out), what i didn't realised at that time was it was still happily hanging around in my house. I got to the safety of my living room and looked at the kitchen carefully to confirm that it's really gone but saw something hopping around my bin instead. The Mynah. :(

All i can say is this was one very determined bird. Very determined to stay in my house that is.

To cut a long story short. I called for help and my saviour came, caught the bird with his hands (cos no amount of chasing seemed to move him) and threw it out of the windows.
Round 1: Mynah 0, BCFUM 1.

Of cos, you would be thinking, no way in hell that it's going to fly up almost 10 floors and find the same unit again. Wrong.

20 minutes later, i saw it hopped in, with an air of arrogance (as if to say 'hey, i remembered how to come back!'), from the main door as if it owns the place! (So that's where it came in from.) I ran towards it and tried to shoo it out of the door but it just flew in over my head. Aaaargh! Then it flew into my bedroom and proceeded to make its claim on MY bed! Nooooooooooooooooooo..... Of cos, i called for help again and out of the window it went again.
Round 2: Mynah 0, BCFUM 2.

Sure, i got smart after the second time, i went and closed the door and all the windows. So thanks to a stalker bird, i got to spend the rest of the day in a self-made sauna. Thanks for nothing Mynah!

I hope i don't have to see YOU again tomorrow. :(

Painting

I just received my credit card bills for last month and realised that i spent almost $400 on 'paints'! Nah, not the artistic painting kind of paints... i am never an artistic kinda person (and dun tell me anything about abstract art, i can turn the picture upside down and right-to-left, stare at it for 3 days and never ever see anything). It's cosmetics i'm talking about. I got 2 new lipsticks, 1 blusher and 1 finishing powder. Yes, i know, those dun cost me $400 (unless they are made of gold)! The rest of the money goes to 4 bottles of whitening skincare. Yeah, i love to 'bleach' myself. Gals should look milky and fair rite?

My galfren's comment when she heard how much i spent and wat i bought was 'Why do u need so much ICI??' :P It's a skill for a gal to apply all the ICI paints and still look au naturel.

I can't wait to test them out.. Now, who wants to date me? :)

i need...

Things i need to do before my next birthday! Which sadly isn't too far off and that leaves me with not much time... :(


1. Sign up for some form of physical class... am thinking of either yoga or pilates. :)
2. Actually going for the above mentioned classes. Haha.
3. Rediscover my personal style.
4. Revamp my wardrobe.
5. Declutter my living spaces.
6. READ more! And i dun mean magazines or street directories or instruction manuals. :P
7. Learn a new hobby, by that i mean something that will keep me entertained for hours.. and blogging doesn't count.
8. Make more friends... i have no friends (why else do u think i am blogging on a saturday nite?).. PATHETIC!

Missing and Forgetting

I was just sitting there in the day and then these thoughts just flashed in my mind. Where are all the people i missed today? What are they doing at that very moment? Do they still remember that i exist? Do they care if i miss them still?

Yes, there are actually people that i miss. I wonder how have they been occassionally. Nope, i dun have a email address, a MSN id, a blog name, much less a mailing address! I guess i will have to miss them until the time when i can actually forget about them.

Excuses 'real' men give themselves

1. Only gay men know how to cook.
2. Only gay men know how to dress fashionably.
3. Only gay men know anything to do with interior designing.
4. Only gay men are sensitive to your needs.
5. Only gay men know how to 'communicate'.
6. Only gay men know how to pick up after themselves.
7. Only gay men cry at sappy korean dramas.
8. Only gay men know how to appreciate chick flicks.
9. Only gay men know how to pick out the perfect gift.


Notice how gay men know EVERYTHING. I wan to marry a gay man! Wahahahahaha.....

I feel good.. nah nah nah nah nah nah nah.. I know that I should..

Yup, that's rite. That's how i felt today. Oh wait, make it yesterday. :)
I was out during the day and did 2 good deeds. Yeah, i know... u must be thinking 'Oh my gosh!?!? She did?? The sun must have rose from the west today!' It's not that i am a horrible, selfish, arrogant, egotistc, narcissistic bitch. (Of cos not! How could u be thinking that?? Now i feel soooooooo sad. Haha!) It's just that i subscribe to the "Every man for himself" school of thought. If u dun help yourself, who in the world is going to help u? No?

So back to my 2 good deeds... Actually, they are no biggies. Just a small gesture on my part but it's something that not much people in our 'first world' country seem to be willing to do so. Make a guess... wat do u think i did today? I gave up my seats in the train on both occassions! :)

The first good deed was on the train to town, an old man came in and i stood up to give up my seat to him although he was standing some distance from me. He got off a few stations later though, while poor me continued to stand until i got to my stop. But it's okie.
The second time was on the trip back home. I was actually engrossed in my magazine and din notice a heavily pregnant woman standing in front of me. By the time i looked up, i guess she has already been standing for a while cos she looked quite tired. Of cos, i immediately stood up and offered her my seat which she accepted gratefully. Wat made me wonder was... why din anybody else offer her a seat?! There were many other abled-bodies planting their fat, lazy butts on the train seats too. I don't suppose they are all blind rite?

And counting...

I just did a stock check on the amount of lingerie i owned. And realised with a mixture of amazement (when did they get this many?!?!) and a little disgust (how did i end up spending so much on them?!?!) that i could wear one new undies every day and it would take me more than 1 month before i got back to the first one! Talk about A LOT! Hahahaa...

Sitting in the drawer were over 20 pairs of lace bikinis, boyshorts, thongs and g-strings! That's not including those comfortable cotton briefs that one wants to wear on any plain, old day. For the uninitiated who are lost in lingerie jargon, please refer to Victoria's Secret for a comprehensive show-and-tell. NO! Of cos not! I am not going to pose in my undies for u! Watever gave u THAT idea? Duhz.....

And we have not even got to the bras and sleepwear yet! At last count, i have around 20 bras and 20 slips/babydolls. Now, i could do a fashion parade and it could last all night! Wahahaa...

I think i should be banned from any lingerie shopping, at least for the time being! Wat? U thought i was going to say 'forever'? Ha! Right. :P